2019 was a really hard year. Scrolling through social media, I've seen so many posts about the joys of 2019. And I'm so glad that my people have had so many sweet victories and joys in 2019. But the fact of the matter is that my 2019 was really hard. I was kicked out of grad school. And then my grandmother died. And then my grandfather died. And then I had to move back in with my parents, effectively losing my independence, while also moving away from a city where I had a circle of friends who I love like family. And then I got a job that I hated that didn't pay me enough to live on my own/support myself in any way. And then our dog died. And then my sister didn't come home for Christmas because she was spending it with her fiance (who is actually great, don't get me wrong, but still). And then I quit my job because I hated it so much, but that also meant I was saying goodbye to coworkers who I have come to really love.
And yet, 2019 was also a really sweet year in the midst of a lot of hard things. I've grown a lot. I've learned a lot about myself and my parents. I'm learning about deep friendship that transcends distance. I'm learning about the value of work and the way God created us to work. I've read a lot. I've written a lot. I've found joy in trying to bring joy to others. I've also sinned a lot, and still been received by God's grace while being called to repentance. 2019 was a year of a lot of tears for me, but tears don't always mean it was a bad year. It was definitely hard, but not bad.
