So there's a kid at my school who's... Well, I'm not sure what he is. Or rather, I wish he wasn't what he is. He plays football. Don't misunderstand. I don't dislike football players until their pride gets in the way and their egos get bigger than Texas. Then they get annoying. And that's kinda the problem with this particular guy.
Once upon a time (last year) he was one of my favorite people ever. I considered him a good friend. I could trust him, and no matter how much he teased me, I knew that when it came down to it he would be there for me. Well, this fall, he started playing football. Need I say more? I probably should.
When he started playing football, he stopped talking to me almost all together. He started hanging out with the jerk-ish guys who play football, especially the ones that think they're all that, even though they have yet to play during a real varsity game. He became the obnoxious jerk who talks straight through class and makes rude jokes about everyone. He even started doing the annoying high socks and tennis shoes thing that all the football players do because they think it's so cool or something. I began hating this "new him" before football season was even half over.
Then he went on my church's ski trip the weekend before we went back to school after Christmas break. He was a completely different person than the jerk he had been lately. He was back to teasing me and talking to me and being one of my favorite people. I didn't even ski with him, but he talked to me anyway. Well, when we went back to school, he went back to being the "new him." It made me so upset. I complained about him more than usual, and my friends noticed. That Wednesday, though, he went to our youth group. He stayed "new him," but he came, which made me glad. He kept coming too. I began praying that the "new him" would leave forever, and that he would revert to the old him. But then he stopped coming. I asked why at school, and he gave me an excuse. This happened for the next few weeks. Finally, I blew up on him. I gave him crap about how he kept giving me excuses and how if he wasn't gonna keep coming, he needed to just say so. After all, (although I didn't say this to him) every week, I would get excited to see him only to have my hopes prove worthless. I was sick of it. His response was "I never said I would keep coming!" Which he had. I was so mad. But I let go. I realized that nothing I could do would bring back the old him. The him that I love. I wanted to just give up. Forget the old him and move on with my life. Forget about him in my prayers, and in my daily life. For a while, I did. Or tried to. But today I realized something. I can't change him, that's true. But I can accept that he's different. That doesn't mean I should stop praying for him. He's still him, even if his personality has changed. So maybe I don't want to spend time with the new him. That doesn't mean I shouldn't pray for him. If he's become a jerk after being a really awesome guy, maybe that awesome guy is still there and will come back someday. But even if he doesn't, I can keep praying for him, and pray that I can love him even if the old him never returns. So now, I'm deciding to accept the "new him" and pray for him regardless. Or try at least.
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